SUBCULTURE BEATROUTE MARCH 2012

SO EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE I STEP OUT OF MY MUSICALLY DESIGNATED COMFORT ZONE BOOKING WISE FOR A COUPLA OF REASONS…ONE BECAUSE I BELIEVE EVERY BAND IN THE WORLD DESERVES A SHOW WITH JOHN THE SOUNDGUY AND TWO BECAUSE I DONT WANT TO CROSS BOOK AGAINST OTHER PUNK AND METAL SHOWS…..

BOY IM REALLY QUESTIONING THAT IDEAL AFTER AN INCIDENT LAST MONTH… SO THESE ‘INDIESCHLOCKGODS’ ROLLED INTO THRASHERS AND SET UP…. SO FAR SO GOOD RIGHT… UGH WRONG!!! A COUPLE OF THE OPENING BAND DUDES WERE POLITE AND CONSIDERATE…GENUINELY DOWN TO EARTH AND WELL AWARE THAT IT WAS AN ILL FITTING VENUE FOR THEIR STYLE… I RECOMMENDED A COUPLE OF VENUES WHERE THEIR SET WOULD BETTER RECEIVED AND THAT WAS THAT….

AS THE CROONING AGONY CONTINUED FOR THE EXCRUCIATING MALAISE SUFFERED FROM A RAUCOUS EVENING OF SCARYOKE THE NIGHT BEFORE I GREW INCREASINGLY MORE UNCOMFORTABLE… IM KICKING MYSELF IN THE HEAD FOR EVEN THINKING I CAN SURVIVE THIS MUSIC…. AS THE ORDER OF THE BANDS CONTINUED MY EARPLUGGING REVVED UP AND BY THE TIME THE LAST BAND WAS SETTING UP THEIR GEAR AT A SNAILS PACE I WAS READY TO BOLT ! I CASHED OUT THE WHOPPING SLOW DOOR AND GAVE THE DOORGUY HIS DOUGH…THE POSTER GIRL HER DOUGH AND DIVIDED UP THE REST BETWEEN THE 4 BANDS TO THE TUNE OF A HUNDRED BUX EACH….

NOW A NORMAL PUNK OR METAL BAND WOULD ACCEPT 100 BUCKS GRACIOUSLY AND THANK YOU FOR THE SHOW WITH A SMILE ON THEIR FACE… THEY SEEM WELL AWARE OF THE FACT THATS THATS ALL THE MONEY TO GO AROUND WHEN YOU HAVE 50 PEOPLE SHOW UP FOR THE SHOW….THESE PRETENTIOUS FUCKS COMPLAINED TO THE OWNER … THE BAR STAFF …THE DOORMAN…. THE POSTER GIRL AND I RECEIVED PHONECALLS AND TEXTS THAT THEY DESERVED MORE MONEY TIL 330 IN THE FUCKING MORNING! SERIOUSLY HAVE THESE PEOPLE NEVER READ ANY OF THOSE HOW TO BE IN A BAND COLUMNS?….

ANOTHER THING IVE BEEN MEANING TO MENTION IS SHOT ETIQUETTE…NOW IT SEEMS TO ME THAT UNLESS YOU GET ALL BARS ON BOARD TO DISPENSE A 1 OZ SHOT IN A DOUBLE SHOT GLASS THERE IS NO REASON TO HAVE TO CLINK GLASSES WHEN TOASTING… PERSONALLY I LOATHE HAVING THE LIQUOR POUR OUT ALL OVER MY HANDS AND CLOTHES LET ALONE THE SPOT IM SITTING AT … I LIKE JUST RAISING YOUR GLASS…. OTHERWISE ITS A MESSY BOOZE CRIME…

ARRGH THIS GENTRIFICATION SHIT IS FUCKING UP POTENTIAL VENUE SPOTS AT A FERVENT PACE… WE WOULD BE DEFINATELY VIEWED AS UNDESIRABLES IN THE CRAIGSLIST OF MODERN WHITEWASHED OPTIONS…. NOT THAT YOU COULD EVEN AFFORD THE RENT AND THE TAXES ON ANYTHING WEVE SEEN AVAILABLE AND WITHOUT A LIQUOR LICENSE TO BOOT…..UGH… SURE MAKES IT HARD TO SHAKE OFF THE 2009 ‘YUPPIESCUMLORD’ OLYMPIC USURPING WHEN YOU OPERATE AT A D.I.Y. CASHFLOW LEVEL….

SPEAKING OF SCUMLORDS FUCKEN EH THAT THE ASHOTAS ARE FINALLY GETTING THEIR KARMIC DUE IN THE FORM OF THE BC GOVERNMENT POTENTIALLY SEIZING ONE OF THEIR PROPERTIES VIA THE FORFEITURE OF CRIME ACT…. CANT THINK OF A BETTER PRICE TO PAY FOR THEM CAUSE THEY ARE ALL ABOUT THE MONEY AS EVIDENCED BY THE COBES DEBACLE! ITS ABOUT TIME THEY GOT THEIR DUE !

BOUGHT SOME ZUCKUSS MERCH THE OTHER NIGHT… A PAIR OF CUTTING EDGE ‘JIZZER ME JOGGERS’… NOW THESE SWEAT PANTS HAVE ZUCKUSS DOWN THE LEG…JIZZER ME JOGGERS PRINTED ACROSS THE BUTT AND SOME ERRRR STRATEGICALLY PLACED CROTCH BLOTCHES OF GLOW IN THE DARK INK THAT LOOKS LIKE…WELL TAKE YOUR BEST GUESS! DONT KNOW IF IM BRAVE ENOUGH TO SPORT THEM IN PUBLIC LIKE JESSE WAS AT THRASHERS THE OTHER NIGHT BUT THEY DO MAKE VERY COMFY LOUNGING ATTIRE…

STOKED ON THE DAYGLO ABORTIONS BACK IN APRIL!
SUPER STOKED THAT TOXIC HOLOCAUST IS COMING BACK TO VANCOUVER IN MAY!
LONG LIVE OUR SUBCULTURE! SOME DAY A HELLHOLE! I STILL MUST HOLD A GLIMMER OF HOPE ON THAT FOR MY SANITY…..CHEERS ~W13

Author: wendythirteen

WRITER OF A COLUMN ABOUT THE UNDERGROUND MUSIC SCENE CALLED 'SUBCULTURE' APPEARED IN BEATROUTE B.C. FROM OCT 2011 - OCT 2016 NOW WRITING FOR ABSOLUTE UNDERGROUND FROM DEC 2016 ON ----> BOOKING LIVE HEAVY BANDS IN VANCOUVER B.C. CANADA NO BOLLOCKS EVENTS

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